Super Secret Surprise!! Breaking News!!!

Ready. Set. Sail!

So far so good. I have to say that this is the longest I’ve been Stable in God knows how long. Years. Either it’s Depression or Mania with me. NOT THIS TIME!! I have been Stable for a solid 3 weeks. Thank God! That’s seriously the longest amount of time I haven’t felt undeniably horny or overwhelmingly distraught. I love it. I can think clearly and basically there is no sign of Mania on the horizon. I’m not bored either. Well. Work has been slow so there’s that. Other than that, no drama.

I want to just say how amazing this is. I want to treasure this while it lasts. God I don’t want to go back up again. I know I said that already but I mean it. It’s more trouble than it’s worth.

The only problem I keep facing is the constant reminders of what happened in 2015. Little things jolt my memory. Of what I did. It feels like a blur. Like it wasn’t me. Even talking to my therapist yesterday, it felt like it wasn’t real. That it didn’t happen. Obviously it did but you can understand what I mean. It feels so surreal. Not that I’m denying what happened but it just wasn’t like me at all. I can’t imagine betraying my husband like that. Not in a million years. You have to believe me when I tell you that the whole thing just makes me wince. It just is SO SO out of my character. I’m still in disbelief. One day it’ll fully sink in I suppose. Sort of like Jekyll and Hyde. How did I get so out of control?

Well I’m rambling aren’t I? I bet you’re waiting for the surprise. Well here it is:


Guess who is the newest bpHope Blogger??!! ME!!! And my first article publishes on March 10 so stay tuned!!

Oh…what’s that?!?!? Yeah I just did that. Hahahaha! You’re probably shocked huh? I debated back and forth about whether or not to SHOW MY FACE. But I trust you guys. No one here is going to rat me out and destroy my life right? Please don’t. I’m honestly not ready to come out of the “bipolar closet” just yet. And tattling is a dick thing to do.

Overall what is the point of working for the bpHope team? Well I wanted to do two things:

  1. Repay bpHope for literally changing my life when it came to learning about hypersexuality and saving my marriage. Without their articles, I would be just absolutely lost and ashamed.
  2. Show the world that life can go on and things will get better. That there is hope. That even through the darkest times that things will get better.

And I sincerely believe that I can help so many people. I do. So I want to write for them. Blog traffic aside, this has been a dream of mine. So I’ll do my best to let the world know that bipolar doesn’t have to have the last word. That it’s tolerable and you have the strength to fight through it. Also, stigma fighting.

So here’s to a great new opportunity. Sorry, no swearing allowed on their site. Don’t worry. You’ll get your routine overdose of my spicy Jamaican goodness on my blog!!!


47 thoughts on “Super Secret Surprise!! Breaking News!!!

    March will be here before we know it!!!!!!!!! When the post is up let us know and we can comment and I’ll keep my f-bombs tucked nicely away. I swear. (Not.) You know what I mean, ha ha ha! I’ll be good!

    This is such a beautiful post too, in the way you thank BP for being there for you with the articles that saved your marriage & validated the hypersexuality stuff, for your wanting to pay it forward and for your sincerely wanting to help other people.

    I’m super-proud to call you my friend, and your secret is safe with me as long as you want to keep it!!!!!!

    Your huge fan,
    Dy “Fryane”

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Oh Fryane, you’re amazing! I’m very thankful for this amazing opportunity. And this site is absolutely phenomenal. The bloggers they have are changing lives. I’m proud to be a part of that. I even have a 2-year subscription to the magazine as well. That’s how much I love them. I LOVE YOU THIIIIIIIIIIIIIS MUCH!!! Hugs!!! XOXOXO

      Liked by 1 person

  2. Reblogged this on Birth of a New Brain and commented:
    I’m so proud o my friend Jess, and want to share her good news!! I’ll be back here at the end of the week – I’m cooking up a post and so far all the ideas have been too tame for my new vision! Stay tuned…and I promise you, there will be no nude memes!!!! That comment was directed at Bipolar On Fire, another fabulous blogger. Take a peek at her “An Open Letter to Meme Posts” if you dare!


    Liked by 2 people

  3. That’s fucking awesome news – although its a bit Fxxxing shitty about the no swearing rules on their blog. πŸ˜‰ πŸ˜› πŸ˜€
    Looking forward. Very brave to ‘show your face’, but nothing to hide there – great pic.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Your comment is the best one I’ve gotten!! Hands down. Yeah it’s fucking sad but I don’t want to bash the site in case they are watching. Like you said, I’ve learned so much from their articles and forum as well. I hope I can be at the same level as some of those award-winning journalists and novelists πŸ˜›

      And yeah I debate whether or not to show my face but I feel like I want some credit to go to myself for all my hard work. And to prove to people I exist. Hee hee.

      Liked by 1 person

  4. I’ve been stable this time since July. I have had 11 antidepressant ‘poopouts,’ a joking clinical term heard behind closed doors. It refers not just to Prozac but any med that loses its’ umph. Good job Jess. Allison

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Oh wow. Thanks for the email. My Contact Page is where people can email me but I’ll provide it for you here as well:
      I’m trying to remain as anonymous as possible. Granted I did give out my photo on bpHope but that was minor. If we do meet, I’d like to keep my real identity secret. I’m not ready for my family to hear what I’ve done.


  5. Can u tell me how to contact bphope? Where I live, bipolar people have their own clubhouse. We focus on managing our disease, make lunch for a heck of a lot of other Bp’s. We have career services, celebrate the holidays if you r alone, and there are other projects including legislation, dances, writing for our newsletter etc. we r in Torrington, CT. If u r in our area,? look up Prime Time.


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